My glory or His?

I’ve been asking myself lately “Is it for my glory or the glory of God?” I first started pondering this question while talking to my spiritual director about doing something more in my ministry, like doing some public speaking or writing a book. We were discussing how Lucifer works. Lucifer means “angel of light” and he gives the appearance of light while leading us into darkness. So, is this desire that I’m having from the Lord, or from Lucifer. During our discussion I started talking about my decision to leave the seminary. I talked about reasons for leaving that I had long forgotten.

While discerning my call to the priesthood I thought about and prayed about my reasons for wanting to become a priest. One of my struggles in life is a fear of rejection. I discovered that what attracted me most about the priesthood was the “fame and glory” of it. My impression of a priest was a man who was loved by his flock. I wanted to become a priest for my glory, not His, and that is one of the main reasons why I left the seminary.

Since I rediscovered this during spiritual direction, I have been asking this question of myself alot–“Is it for my glory, or Gods?” This applies not just to my desire to public speak or write a book, but to EVERYTHING I do. I am trying to ask myself that question with everything I do, even with starting this blog. It is extremely hard, not only to determine who’s glory I’m seeking, but also to surrender my wants over God’s.

Lord, give me the strength and wisdom to put You first in all I do, to give YOU the glory, and to not seek it for myself.

Published in: on September 5, 2008 at 1:29 pm  Leave a Comment  

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